you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
