i already hear my dad disowning me
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
