I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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