he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize