lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Randomize