Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Randomize
