Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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