and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
