sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
third nipple confirmed
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
