So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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