There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
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