that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
