I'm gonna have a badass scar
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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