you traded sex for a burrito?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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