check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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