have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
