Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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