new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
