I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Randomize
