yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
