We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize