i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
