She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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