I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
