i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
