butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
