so that wasnt chicken after all
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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