For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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