He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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