I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize