to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
