I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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