I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
