fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
