im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
