Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
