i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
