'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
