I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
