He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
