there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
babies were throwing up all over the place
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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