we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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