is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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