Whod you bang
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
