So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
