Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
