No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
