I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize