seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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