Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
