Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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